I have a new friend, Jo, who also doubles as a healthcare provider.  She recently emailed me to ask if we could reschedule an appointment we had scheduled 2 weeks prior.  When I read her reason, my heart squeezed in compassion and tears came to my reading eyes, not only for the tragedy that she was sharing, but also for the immense kindness she was revealing.   Jo shared with me that one of her clients, who had only recently moved to our Middle Tennessee area and had no friends or family close by, called her in hysterics on Tuesday morning.  Her client's husband had been admitted to the hospital over the past weekend because he was feeling achy and yucky.  He also then suddenly, and with shocking unexpectedness, died.  This new widow was completely alone in a new city with only one person she knew she could trust.   She called Jo.  And Jo knew immediately what she had to do.  There were no questions, there were no pauses, there were no maybes.  She just "did" what so many of us forget to do when we hear of someone who needs something.  She went to her client's side to be there while she waited for family to arrive from out-of-town.  She went to comfort the unconsolable.  She went to just "be" where she was needed.  Jo's example reminds us that an opportunity to be kind can come at any time and in any form, but it's up to us to step into the role.  It's up to us to let go of our habits of keeping our lives ordered and controlled and tightly calendared.  And, to let go of our tendencies to keep to ourselves, lest our hearts get broken.  To embrace who we really are - beings of love, empathy, compassion, and kindness.  Thank you, Jo for being you and being a beautiful portrait of kindness for someone who so desperately needed it.  You are also now that portrait for complete strangers. 

Today I was the recipient of a very random act of kindness.  I went to eat lunch at a well-known downtown eatery and simply ordered soup and some bread, along with my usual hot water and lemon.  I proceeded to have a perfectly contented lunch, enjoying the great soup and doing a crossword puzzle.  It was a no-stress lunch.   After I had nearly emptied my bowl, my already gracious and attentive server, Montel, asked if I'd like another bowl of soup and some more bread, to which I replied, "sure!"   I had previous experience with this restaurant offering a free soup refill (though it didn't happen all the time), so when Montel asked, of course, I was happy to accept.  By the time I finished my second bowl of soup and some more bread, I felt quite comfortable and full and ready to get back to work.  I let Montel know that I needed my check when he came by to pick up my empty dishes.  It was then he said, "It's on the house."  I actually protested with him, but he insisted, saying I had just had soup and lemon water, so there would be no charge and that I shouldn't protest when something kind is done for me.  Of course, I couldn't argue with him and thanked him.  Montel then asked me to "pay it forward," which I knew I'd have no problem doing.  So, I left him with a "God bless you" and a tip.   I'm still smiling this afternoon while thinking on his kindness.  I think this particular instance had made more aware than any other that this really was a random act of kindess, made all the more random by the fact that I didn't actually appear to need the extra kindness.  It was obvious that I was employed (I had told Montel that I needed to get back to work), I was dressed in a suit - so he could logically deduce that I wasn't living on the streets, and it was obvious that I was under no stress which would signal to someone that I needed an extra dose of kindness.   But as I further evalulate my definition of "needing" extra kindness, I realize that kindness is in fact needed by every one of us, regardless of whether we are in dire straits or suffering through bad times.  And, if we think we don't actually need kindness except when we are truly "in need" (i.e. bankrupt, ill, without work, lonely, depressed, etc.), then we do an injustice to the act of kindness and show a sad ingratitude to those who act kindly toward us.  So, thank you, Montel ... you've not only bestowed a simple act of kindness upon a stranger, but you've opened my eyes to a greater understanding of how powerful kindness is to each and every one of us, and made me understand even more how random and unexpected kindness has the power to change the world.

I just returned from a vacation with my husband's family in Florida.  Of course, we're exhausted and need a "vacation from our vacation," but there were many kindnesses I was able to witness while we were gone - one of which I'm compelled to share.  We were making our long return drive and had just crossed the border into Georgia.  As we had all three of our dogs with us, we decided to stop at the Atlanta Visitor Center/rest area to walk them and give our legs a stretch.   I was holding two leashes and also watching our littlest dog who was unleashed when I noticed a very methodical movement out of the corner of my eye.  I glanced up to the parking area and noticed two women walking, obviously back from a bathroom break based on the direction they were walking.  Now, normally, two women walking back to their vehicle wouldn't be anything to write home about.  However, it was how they were walking that riveted my attention.  They were walking in tandem - think 2-seater bicycle - in that one woman was walking directly behind the other, with their torsos and legs moving in exact sequence with each other.  Obviously, there was more to the story here that my mind hadn't quite picked up on at first glance.  I looked closer.  I noticed that the woman in the lead was quite elderly and the woman behind her was somewhat younger - maybe 50 years or so - possibly her daughter?  I also noticed that the younger woman had her arms curled under the arms of the older woman, so that she was actually holding her close against her.  I then had my "Ah ha" moment, comprehending that the younger woman was actually helping the older woman walk.  No professional dancers I have ever seen were more in sync with each other.  Every step was matched perfectly as the knees of the younger woman met the back of the older woman's knees, helping to lift her legs forward as each foot was placed down and weight shifted.  It was mesmerizing, like a small train moving on invisible tracks in the pavement.  That's when I was struck by the simple, gentle, loving, and patient kindness in this scene as I answered my own questions of "Why did they park so far from the bathrooms?" (because they were easily 150 feet from where the handicapped parking was) and "Why isn't she in a wheelchair?"  I let my mind stretch a bit to deduce certain possibilities:  maybe the older woman had recently been injured or had surgery on her legs/hips or maybe she had had a stroke and was trying to learn to walk again and needed or wanted to rehabilitate quickly in order to be able to be back on her own.  I then asked myself "How many of us (including myself) would be willing to step up (literally) and help a loved one in this way?"  It was obviously hard work and a job most of us have seen passed on to a health care provider.  However, I could see the healing power of the kindness of looking after one's own without handing them off to someone else.  I could see the faith of the younger woman that the older woman could and would heal to walk on her own.  I could see the trust of the older woman in the younger that she would not let her fall or fail.  And I could see how any person who witnessed this could be challenged to step up and help in ways far less challenging than this when asked to do so.  I witnesses the kindness of selflessness in a world of selfishness and I hope never to forget it. 

Okay ... this isn't a huge, earth-shattering type of kindness, but to me sometimes those small, everyday kindnesses are the ones that stick with us - maybe because they're so easy to accomplish by the average person.  This morning, our building managers stood in the lobby of our downtown office building and handed out red and pink long-stemmed roses for Valentine's Day.  What a beautiful and thoughtful way to start a day!  The rose handed to me was a lovely, dark, bubblegum pink and waved to me on my desk throughout my very busy and stressful hours.  Each time I looked at it or smelled its soft fragrance, I was delivered back to the smile and warm "Hello!" and "Happy Valentine's!" that accompanied its delivery upon my arrival at work.   It is a kindness that will be remembered all weekend long as well, since I took the rose home with me.  I started thinking about all the people who received those Valentine's roses this morning.  I thought of how many different ways their days might have been kindly and gently altered.  I imagined that some of the recipients might have had a rough morning even before they left home, or a stressful drive in through morning traffic, or had been feeling ill from the common winter ailments, or felt sadness at being alone, or had arrived in our building with the hopes of a new job - yet they received a small, but precious gift.   The gift of one rose and the kindness that went with it most certainly lifted my spirits, I can imagine it did the same for others. 

Consideration of others is a noble and universally-recognizable trait, usually most often seen and/or granted when we are comfortable and secure in our surroundings, with our own needs met.  At present, I am aware of the kind consideration of a woman who has traveled far outside of her comfort zone to a tiny foreign land, thousands of miles from her home, family and friends, for the sole purpose of sharing programs geared to protect children and adults from all forms of abuse.  She is traveling alone, six months post-surgery, out of shape, at age 67, at her own expense, simply because she believes anyone can make a difference in this world.  She is making a conscious choice to be temporarily uncomfortable in order to advocate for those who cannot advocate for themselves - in a society that argues, "Well, this is our culture," as if that would ever be a valid defense for the abuse of any human being, let alone a child.   While I know there are many other world citizens who actively choose to go where they are needed - and I applaud that noble consideration -  I happen to know this particular woman.  She is my mother. 

I experienced, this very morning, unfortunate thoughts of impatience as I watched from 20 cars back as a large semi truck cut in front of three lanes of traffic immediately before a busy intersection.  I say "unfortunate," because I had already been thinking of the purpose of this site immediately prior to those negative and impatient thoughts.   Thankfully, not long after the truck got through the traffic (and I got through the intersection), I realized that I had been looking at it from the very perspective I was trying to avoid with this website.   Shame on me!  So, I changed perspectives and lo and behold, I was able to see and appreciate the patience of those three drivers who courteously stopped and provided a gap for the driver of this huge truck, who without this kindness, would have had to wait for many more minutes than I had to.   I'm usually a polite driver as well, but sometimes when I get in a hurry, my manners slink into hiding.  This was a gentle reminder that kindness is all around us, even when we're not the ones exhibiting it.  God bless those patient drivers this morning. 

I'm not sure why I was surprised by my husband's recent thoughtfulness of me ... after all, I married him because of his sensitive and loving nature ... but recently he caught me off guard by surprising me on my birthday.  It's not so much the surprise cakes or the surprise guests that came to celebrate with me, it's the fact that HE thought of it, HE planned it, HE spent the energy on me when I was actually feeling a bit "let down" on my birthday due to not hearing from important people in my life and honestly thinking that even my husband didn't bother with anything more than taking me to dinner and a movie the night before.   It's funny how perspectives change when you become aware that the person you love more than any other HAS been thinking of doing something especially for you for weeks.  Like I said before, I already know of his sensitivity and loving heart, so I shouldn't have been all that blindsided by his efforts, but I honestly was and fell in love with him all over again.